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Dad Convo # 1 Million

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My dad, aka The Sarge, with my headphones that were not returned.

Everybody is just trying to get paid these days.  They can’t just see the bigger vision and picture.

Again, one of those people is my dad.

I feel very fortunate to talk to my dad all the time.  I try to check on him as much as possible since he’s retired due to medical reasons. But I’m starting to feel some type of way. LOL. I think he can work (for me).

Let me caveat the rest of my story with the reason I decided to give my dad his own section on my blog ANYWAY.  He’s a funny, dry humor, stern but nice guy.  He laughs at his jokes before the punch line, and he gets mad when you don’t laugh. Then we argue and he hangs up – and calls me back 20-30 seconds later and asks “You didn’t get it for real?”

So anyways – I’ve been wanting to record some of our conversations so that you all can really feel my pain and listen to the bizarreness first hand that goes on between us.

This morning, I brought it up again. Here’s how the conversation went:

Me: Dad I need a favor. Please.

Dad: (long pause) – what?

Me:  I’ll pay you.

Dad: You? Pay me?  You still owe me some money but go ahead.

Me: (long pause) Yeah, so, I need to start recording our conversations, dad. They are funny. I mean, I think people would really enjoy our conversations.  I think we’re being selfish.  People will fall in love with The Sarge.  

Dad: You really spreading the butter aint you?

Me:  You are like the real life Bill Cosby for real!

Dad: You lost me. You want people to sue me. I have a past.

Me: Dad we all have a past. And you don’t have that kind of past.  (long pause) wait, Dad?

Dad:  Bad example. Bad.

Me: Ok yeah, I just think our conversations are funny and people will enjoy them.

Dad: I am not a toy you know. 

Me: Dad I’ll pay you. $20 a conversation.

Dad: Shit. I need six figures baby, 6. I don’t think you can afford me, honestly.

Me: Nah. Too much. You’re not famous yet.

Dad: No comment. 

Me: Just think about it.

Dad: I’ll have my people call your people. 

Me: Ok, really? Your people, are my people.

Dad: Nah, I got new management. Now. How many news headlines did you read this morning?

Me:  Um, can I call you right back?

Dad: Pitiful. Bye.

[end]

Typical.

I think he’ll agree to it. We’ll see.

Have a great day!

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Hi! My name is Cheryl but my friends call me Bloom. I'm a 34 year old true, old soul millennial who decided to start a blog about becoming an adult, a woman, foodie and dating. I love self help books, oldies and talking to people about life. I like to laugh and tell jokes. I like to buy "sh!t" as my dad says that I usually don't need but what girl doesn't?! Thanks for stopping by. Come back any time.

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