All posts filed under: Diary

Use Me

Use Me In A Good Way Don’t do the things you know will break me Recognize opportunities where you can destroy me but don’t Allow me to let down my guard and open up to you Don’t see my weak spots and exploit me, or take from me, for your personal gain Use Me In A Good Way To help you, love you, support you, show affection – let’s be love Let me do what I do best – lift you up. Let’s reciprocate positive ways to use each other: maximize strengths and minimize weaknesses Use Me In  A Good Way or Leave Me Alone #30Days30Layers (Entry from November 23) Advertisements

Pillow Talk

…usually what I consider to be some of the best parts of my relationships.  Where guards have been down, minds were open, eyes were locked, and hearts were engaged. …vulnerability at best Sometimes I still speak as if you were there Sometimes I still see you laying next to me on the other pillow Sometimes I speak to the future man that will lay there forever (like the whole married thing) Sometimes I speak to myself Sometimes I rehearse or repeat what I should say or should’ve said My pillows have wiped many tears and been on the receiving end of a couple of blows but if my pillow could talk it would tell me everything is going to be ok Entry from Nov 22 of my #30Layers30Days Writing Challenge

Not Here To Stay

I’m at a point in my life where I finally understand that nothing lasts forever. With that acceptance actually comes appreciation and a willingness to flow with life…. the good times…. the bad times the sad times the lonely times the laughter the tears ….are not here to stay. All of things I have experienced in my life so far were not here to stay but to teach me lessons, help me grow, and get closer to my true self. #30Layers30Days  

Too Little Too Late

I held on.  Year after Year. I let go slowly of the possibilities and promises but I still held on. My heart was only for you. My body, and My time.  All yours. I always knew you’d continue to let me down but I would still try to bait you. I wanted you to come back but I didn’t want you to stay. I didn’t trust you anymore. I knew there was no going back to our once upon a time. A lot happened between then and now. Unforgivable and Unforgettable stuff. But I still baited you. I still, though reluctantly, answered your call(s). My heart and my brain were never on the same wave. Ever. My soul did not want you. That’s an interesting thing.  My ego wanted you to want me again. The self esteem you tainted needed your vindication.  All I wanted to hear was “I want to be with you. It’s always been you. Let’s try this again, for real.” And finally, one day, you said it. Sincerely. I actually believed …